Guilty

YOU

CAUGHT

ME

I'm guilty, yes I am.

Just like the rest of you

Don't try to hide it.

I can hear that smirky little smile underneath that mask.

I can see the pleasure in your eyes as you move off the sidewalk to pass me.

I can feel your releif when you don't have to hug me when you see me.

Suddenly, a weight that once held us down,

A 20lb dumbell that told us to help the old lady cross the street instead,

Allows us to keep our heads down.

FINALLY!

An excuse to stare at my phone in the Smith's self-checkout line.

Or to totally ignore that weird looking guy in the Smith's self-checkout line,

Or to avoid nose paralisis from that smelly lady in the Smith's self-checkout line

But, the only place we can go

IS

The Smith's checkout line.

So,

I start

To like

These people I was trying to

Avoid.

Like the 40 year old dad telling jokes,

Or the grocery clerk smiling as big as the watermelon you just bought.

Yes

I miss the awkwardness.

I miss the pointless greetings,

The useless hugs,

The hollow repetitions 

of, "Have a nice day".

I miss it all,

I'm guilty!

You caught me.