Half wirtten love notes

Why is it so hard to write about you? The piles of wadded papper strewn across the floor is a testamnet to our past. Each holding a piece of me that hurts too much to linger on for long. Like the time when we first kissed under the stars, the moon lighting the field just enough to see your deep brown eyes starring down into mine. Or the time you first said you loved me. When my heart burst out of my chest at the thought that this moment could effectively change the outcome of my life. Maybe its because when i think back to those moments and all the hope i had at our story unfolding in front of us, its now tinged by sadness and despair. I can't write about the happy times because it kills me to think how something so wonderful could have gone so wrong.