im only happy when im depressed

im only happy when i wear black

im only happy at night

i wish i could relieve you of your pain

i prefer to talk about the fear of living as opposed to the fear of dying

i can hear my own death

for the fear of my tears crying

i know i live in a dead end time

and the only feelings  i share are no feelings at all

im sick and tired of you asing me whats wrong, my life

dont you know pain is all that i have

that my pain is my only form of nuture

my pain is my life, my health

let me tell you about happiness

being sexually assaulted more than 5 times

its better to feel abuse than nothing at all

dont you know i hate laughter and smiles

dont you know i hate good feelings

cause the only feelings i feel are no feelings at all

they couldnt protect me but ill live my life protecting them