Happiness

Why do I do this to myself,

Self seeking to serve my endless help,

To destroy my soul to please another,

And have them lead me on to a road I can't seem to muster,

I can't make it so help me,

I cry but no one pulls me from the whole I dug I see,

Why Love left  me high and dry when I was most devoted,

Why can't it please my heart why leave me to drown when I was closest,

The closest to giving it all it wanted,

The closest to loving it more than Love has flaunted,

But in dire times when you need a sign they appear,

Mine came in my darkest hour when cried too much to shed a tear,

I'm a fool to put all my hope in you,

Cling to you with all my breath so I could even breathe through,

Breathe through the heart aches,

Breathe through the pain,

Survive the emotional stakes,

to breathe another day,

But years go and days come, I will find my new path spread my happiness to not be so dumb.