Happy?

I tried it,
it used to be nice as it lasted.
I couldn't stay that way.
A stranger to myself.
Looking in that mirror everyday,
not recognizing the person looking back.
Wanting to shatter the mirror,
into a million pieces.
I want happiness,
just not understanding how to reach it,
makes it feel as unobtainable.
He showed it to me.
In that midnight hour.
When everything made no sense.
That light I will not forget.
The butterflies in my chest as I look and breath.
From midnight hour to midday light,
light showed the way.
Now loving and being loved,
showing me light not darkness.
Now understanding happy,
he showed it to me.
So thanking him is never enough,
because in the end it's he who I love.