hatred

Sometimes i still feel like theres a void in my chest 

But its always there like a spider thats always there near you never leaving, but you almost never notice it.

Sometimes i stillwish apon a star to have the void to fill in my heart 

I sit there hoping he will wake up and relize that his little girl is now grown up and that i changed

Changed to the point of no return

But he doesnt get that he never will because he doesnt want to believe that im nonbinary and bi

He is always saying hurtfull shit but he doesnt do it in front of mom atleast not all the time

Sometimes i wish he never made it that day when he had his heartattack i don't wish him dead but atleast i would not have learned to hate him.