he made me human

I sure do wish that he had done something differently.

It’s not much. And i say that i don’t have regrets. But i do wish that he had been there.

When i told my family about he and i, the reaction wasn’t exactly positive.

But a good part of me feels like if they had seen him look the way that he does at me, maybe things would have gone a bit differently. 

He looks at me like nobody ever could, you know.

His eyes are so large, there’s so much behind them

That sometimes i forget

He’s staring right at me with those pretty eyes of his

And thinking that mine are pretty, too

Maybe if grandma had seen that look

And remembered how it felt for her

She would’ve understood how much i love the boy

That i’m feeling feelings irreplaceable

Maybe she’d know how he loves me then

If my family could have understood what it felt like when i touched him

The tenth time he came to my house

Maybe then they’d comprehend 

How i love him, and i loved him then.

That’s true, i love him, and i told them all 

In the middle of my old house

But my mama said as she looked at me,

“Not possible,

That is just not human.”

I laugh at that when i think of it now

Because for something “not human”, it was the most human thing that i had ever felt

When i touched him and he said, “never leave me, never”, 

I knew it was the only promise that i had ever really kept, i’d lock my arms around him 

Just because he asked me to 

Forever.

And that’s why it was funny 

He made me human and he gave me joy

And all of my friends loved us together and never did they tell me against it

But my mama, my dad, my grandma and my sister

All came to the same consensus:

“That is not human,

Dear young child

That boy could never love you so

And if you go along with this

All of your friends will leave you

Your life lifted from underneath you

And everything will fall apart

That is not human,

Dear young child

It never could be, and you know it

So goodbye to you son

You can come back when your boy is gone

And everything crumbles

And you know that you blew it.”