Headaches.
Into the darkness
Is where I go.
I am driven by the
War in my head.
Lights are off and
The window is shut.
My eyes begin to swell,
The tears begin to build up
In the creases of my eye lids.
The sobs begin slow
For I know that if it gets worse
Things might get disastrous.
It almost feels like my mind is
Trying to escape its own mind.
The pain either comes in waves
Of a large ocean being slammed
Against a rock.
Or it feels as if two people are
Pressing hard on two
different cookie cutters,
fighting for the same piece of “dough”.
Tonight though,
I am going to a place
Where I will no longer feel pain.
Sleep
Sleep
Sleep
Is the only thing to get
true peace.
I begin to cry a river,
with ragged currents flowing
down my cheeks,
I force pills down my throat
To help numb the pain
I no longer want to feel.
My hands cover my mouth now,
Trying to mumble the screams
My body wants to let out.
Is my body resisting against me
Or is it trying to tell me something?
The pills begin to kick in,
My chest begins to slow down,
The tears begin to dry.
My eyes shut for the last time today.
I finally begin to feel peace.
Everything is calm.
Everything is sweet.
After a short seven hours
I wake, almost forgot but,
My lovely friend never left.
It started to fight again.