Heartless

It's all the same, time after time, i see the same scenario. Its always me, standing alone in the rain choked by the very air and emotion around me. Barely able to stand as im brought to my knees, crippled and holding a wilted rose to my chest, the winds of doubt howling near me as I rebuke them. But they only blow me back stronger, bringing me back to the same spot, paralyzed by fear captivated by chance and torn apart limb from limb by love. I keep giving that monster a chance, but it always throws me back under this oak tree, stuck in the pain as rain washes away every tear so that the outside wont ever know my sorrow. It leads me out into tommorow apprearing as normal with no emotion no concern to the outside world, but only the chosen can see the cracked, broken form that is the real me. The lashes and cuts from the same scenario dragging me back under the pelting raid as the sihlouettes of regret and abysmal hopes taunt me, laughing and joking  at me to give that wretched beast another try. But everytime I do it lets me rise to my feet only to paralyze me and rip out my heart again. and though I know its coming it shocks me to my very core. but ever looming in the back of my head is the solace that eventually...there wont be a heart to rip out anymore.