him instead of you

I love you ...i truly do. You make feel complete, you make me feel comfortable. You brought out a part of me that had almost faded away. Through the years we grew to each other . we learned every detail about each other that not even ourselves has realized. Although there is no particular reason, i view you differently now . you used to be my happiness, my go-to person. I remember wanting to spend every single day with you. I remember that as my phone lit up with your name on it ,so did my face. I remember every love song i heard, i finally understood. I remember being happy . i remember our saddest, happiest, most intimate moments. I remember every single one. but what i don't remember is when it  all started to go away. I don't understand how or why. Because although i know i love you, i don't feel it . and although i want a future with you , i don't see it anymore. 

When i kiss you i close my eyes in hope to find the butterflies but i guess they all decided to travel towards another guy. Because  when i kiss him they appear with burning fire that won't go away even when our lips aren't touching anymore. As i feel them i try to catch them in my memories so that when in kiss you again i can release them and it all be fine again. But it doesn't happen. Its the worse feeling knowing that i need you but i dont love you. That i want you but i dont feel you.