Hmong-American

Being an Asian American is not easy. I get misidentified. A lot.

Is my identity just another guessing game?

I get asked: Are you Chinese? Japanese? No wait…Vietnamese?

Or are you Mongolian? Korean? Thai? No.

I am not Chinese or Japanese or Korean.

I am none of those.

I am Hmong. Hmong-American.

For many Americans, the Hmong people are a mystery.

That’s because we are rarely mentioned in American history.

Maybe you’ll find articles of us, in archives of an old library.

Or from the lips of a veteran when he spins his stories,

But we will never be a part of the textbooks that you’ll read.

Being American is a good thing, right?

Wrong. Being “American” is not a blessing.

It means being in the welfare system and depending on federal aids,

Living in one-roomed apartments or homes under Section 8.

Grandparents, aunts, uncles, and children of varying ages

Crammed into walls so tight, like birds stuffed into cages.

Being Hmong means having limited rights.

When farming is the only choice,

Because the Hmong language has no political voice.

It means committing to opium drugs and petty gang crimes.

Hosting illegal cockfights in the backyards

And purchasing under-aged overseas Hmong brides.

With no formal education, we have unskilled occupations.

Because we are victims of displacement, we are victims of exploitation.

Today, we are still questioned about our progress on assimilation.

Being Hmong - American means being unaware of the genocide.

There are Hmong people being pursued; chased down by airplanes.

Planes that release bombs, bullets, and chemical agents like the rain.

For them, “Hmong” means running away with nothing but fear on your back.

Disconnected from a homeland this generation will never see

The Secret War ended four decades ago, yet there are still Hmong refugees.

Being Hmong American is not easy.

We didn’t choose this option. No.

Our history was shaped by “manifest destiny,”

Set out by the white capitalist colony.

In efforts to stop communism, yet that same body, THAT SAME BODY,

Encouraged racism, segregation, and discrimination

That lead to ignorance, arrogance, and even violence.

Being Hmong-American means you speak English proficiently,

It means at the age of 5, you stopped learning Hmong vocabulary

Because when Kindergarten introduced “English Only”

I am suddenly part of the “model minority.”

Within a blink of an eye, years go by and I can’t communicate

With my grandparents because they don’t know how to assimilate

I try to practice, I try to reeducate, and I try to reciprocate

I try to translate, and I try to relate but it is me, ME, who needs to acculturate

To the narratives of not the dominant but the unknown subordinates.

Being Hmong-American means you survived the blows of your past,

But being alive, it isn’t the same as living.

What is living when your traditions, your language, and your culture are dying.

Now it’s up to us, Hmong-Americans, to stop lying

That it is great to be  American.