How?

Lighting strikes the earth 360 times in one minute, so I wonder how close will I be to my goal in that same minute? Will whatever I do make as much of a difference as the spark of ions in that same strike?

I can’t wait to be a future where I don’t see the same version of myself.

The version of myself that found the idea of change itchy and uncomfortable, like a caterpillar that sitting in that cramped, dark cocoon. Not ready for its wings.  Or a sapling just growing it’s first set of leaves in the spring. The stressed bark and stretched limbs. I am stronger now, and not only richer in knowledge but trusting in myself.

The old me now sits in chair, rooms away. But in this home, I get to flicker the light switch, change the sheets, and carry this weight. The weight of my past, present, and future. I now get to slingshot myself into any direction I want, and run down any path whether it be dark or illuminated.

I have no more relapses in my decisions, or manic panic dreams. It is just an open door. I remember I used to tell myself my words and my actions remind me of dresses on sale, to be so cute and yet so cheap, but now it couldn’t be true.
 

The revolution is finally here, but it has yet to make change
And the world’s theater is closing it’s curtains too quick for us to see finale.
And I remember lost innocence like shoe lost from its pair.
 

But the most interesting thing about living is that you are always too close to the bliss of freedom.

Now I do not shame myself anymore for the person i’ve become, but oh god the memory of that person was like... the pink elephant in the room. So brightly pink, and undisposed of itself. Never to be washed up, thrown in wind like caution, and screamed from rooms away.

I’m so happy. So happy that in this space, I can have a life of my own. Unfaltering and just a bit salty. Life itself is no longer static, not black and white like an old picture show.

I’m so glad I get to share space with others, even the people in this very room. That you all have unsaid and said truths amongst yourselves. Having your own ideas and loves moving and shaking. Beams of light that shine from you all. I get to see that in every person I pass.

Finally I quake with fear, and am awestruck by this unfathomable power. This power to live deliberately and fantastically.
 

Life itself bursts from me now, untethered and free.