How to love
How to love
Sounds like a self-help book for starters
You see I am a junkie compelled by my heart to cast my line into this vast ocean called love.
I waited anxiously for pull a tug,
but nothing came.
Seconds to minutes, minutes to hours. I began to grow cold
Which later turned to bitterness and shame.
No one ever taught me how to love.
What was the right way,
what was I doing wrong?
Please, someone, give me more of an answer than just
you are too young.
I swallow my pride and turn to hope
waiting on a chance maybe just maybe I can float.
Float through the sea and maybe be pulled down and be enveloped by this feeling of love
I thought I knew what love meant.
I believed I knew until my dying breath
It was a chance, a moment, a beautiful work of art that turned me into a gushing fool
But I let it fall apart.
I was looking for an answer that was already there
I struggled constantly over thinking a simple interaction was something
But that wasn’t fair
Thinking love can be so simple it can be found in the palm of my hand
I am a hopeless romantic whatever that means
No, look you see
It used to mean
That one person would obviously
give their heart and soul to a person whenever they need it to be
It means that when they get rejected they would somewhat understand that it could never be a
we
Now the term hopeless romantic means three different things
clingy, pushy, and don’t want to be
I say this because that is what I have become I clung to the old and pushed away the new and I struggle every morning thinking
who?
Who could I love that would love me
See I was in a commitment once that made me blind to reality.
I focused all my time and effort into building a castle for a princess that was off with another prince because they didn’t understand my morality.
I told a truth when I should’ve spilled a lie
And looking back I can never fully understand why
Why would I
Was this the love I hoped for all my life?
Did I let it slip through my fingers and float to the sky?
I keep wondering so much it ended up poisoning my mind
Every one of my companions taking the time to explain my mistake to me
saying it’s about time I started thinking clearly
I wasn’t really given a chance to grieve
The love I had for her was quickly buried and forgotten by everyone else except me
And I do from time to time think is this how love is supposed to be
Did I make a mistake, or will it take time for these memories erase?
I really don’t know and it’s making my heartbreak
Like little cracks that grow deeper and deeper as the blood rushes through my veins.
It’s not normal or maybe it is I just want a real answer
Anything is better than this
When someone says love is a complex question
I want to scream no
It’s not we are the ones who complicate it
We play games and manipulate each other with the feelings that are supposed to bring us happiness and peace to one another
Sex is used as a weapon instead of intimacy
Everyone keeps asking are they just talking or are they a thing
That what makes everything so damn confusing
The war wages on whose wrong and whose right
People getting played and getting lost in the fight
A healthy relationship stems from three simple rules
One Love yourself before you can love another
Two Love is powerful don’t get drunk off it
Three Love is a privilege not a right
My favorite part of the relationship is when I get to hold their hand
A simple thing to understand
For one reason
I wear my heart on my sleeve
I am willing to share it with a person who can see me.
Love is moment thing
don’t let it slip out into the sea
This how I love
this is me