Hurt

I wish I wouldn't be defined my hurt. Ecounter my parents infront of doors would be welcoming, doing the socks of my father in right order wouldn't feel like needing to solve mathematics without already not knowing what the solution is of the forecoming, and already understanding my work wouldn't feel pleasent while knowing there will be more coming. ,,I'll never come there". I hate that I've never found the solution, even though I knew not to inhale the pollution. ,,Time will heal", my friend says. But why not now? How people for example know everything quickly by heart, learn and do. They are always forward. Why am I not? Why can I not? Why am I not allowed to not?