I adore it. Really.

I adore it, really I do

Or maybe that's a lie I've been taught to be true.

Everywhere I go whether the store or a zoo,

Bombardments of "ahs" and "oos" obliterate me,

So I don't dare to tie my shoe, 

Just so you won't get the "wrong idea."

I hear you, don't you worry, 

I don't want to construe.

I just was just wondering,

 if I could change your angle of view.

Attend self defense classes and carry pepper spray.

Take out your keys at night,

And not just to unlock your door.

And with these yawps and whistles and woos,

They will still expect you to say thank you.