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I am


I am

I am a son 

a brother 
something different completely other 
an amalgamation of love 
a pool of hate
And melancholy's incarnate.
I am at all times at the brink ready to drown 
I suffer 
I smile 
Sometimes I am nature 
one with the wild
Shooting stars and the ones that twinkle 
I will some day grow grey old becoming one with my wrinkles
I am my scars 
My tattoos 
My hair 
my shoes 
As ugly curly and beaten as they all may be
I am these words that you have started read 
I am a long variable list of things 
Bipolar
Depressed
Black 
Ghetto
Even though some don't like to admit it 
I am a human being 
And I feel the weight of emotions 
Swaying like waves in the ocean 
Currents heading towards the sun on the skyline
I am my hurt 
My pain 
I am my name
I was once a father but that is a story for another day
But above all else I am me
A product of my culture 
A product of racial mixing 
And bombs ticking for the day 
That I am comfortable enough in my skin to explode
Loud and proud that am what I am 
Black 
Proud 
Scarred 
And scared for the future 
I am me Nicholas B
Or lucky if you will.
 
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