I am Becoming

I am not whole

Not yet

Not ever

I am pieces of a girl

stitched with shaking hands

and bloody fingers

Bruised all over

In a heart

as cold as silver

where is my plan

because it is not with faith

it is not with love

i feel too much

and not at all

I laugh too much

but not enough

I am in pain

but my pain is not real

enough for you

What I've become

is stronger

and angrier

the meek will inherit

but the fierce will take

I am selfish

I will give nothing

to those who show me nothing

but expect everything

from me

I do not have to forgive

because I owe you nothing

my heart

my mind

my body

they are my own

and I am theirs

I have learned

from angry hands and tender hearts

I am just a speck

in the universe

of stars and galaxies and great big hands that hug angels and suns

I will never be the moon

but I will be something

I will become

someone