I am Looking at the Stars

It’s one AM I’m sitting on the dock I’m looking at the stars They are so beautiful here You can even see the Milky Way I’m trembling Why do I seem to need to? I am sitting on the dock, I am staring at the night sky My face is emotionless It’s getting hard to look at the stars There are so many tears in my eyes I am trembling I am looking at the stars I am all alone, the others wanted to go enjoy the hot tub I said I’ll sit with the boat So here I sit, on the dock, looking at the stars I am listening to music I am trembling and there are tears flooding my field of view Why do I seem to need to? I feel so passionately about life I feel so scared about life Why can’t I just tell them Why can’t it be easy This weekend was supposed to be fun It has been a nightmare for me I am surrounded by people I love Most of whom I have known my whole life Yet none of them truly know me Do I even know me? I’m still so so young yet I already feel like I am running out of time Why can’t I just tell them I am sitting on the dock I am looking at the stars All of those stars have a reason Why do I hurt those closest to me That’s one thing I’m good at, hurting people The stars can’t hurt people The stars were here before me and they will remain after I am gone I don’t want to be gone I am not living I am surviving I miss you I am sitting on the dock I am looking at the stars They are so breathtaking