I Am Not Okay

I Am From

Showing compassion,

Caring for everyone

Even if you were my worst enemy,

I'd try my hardest to please you.

I am From

Being positive,

Showing my smile and enthusiasm when others can't.

I am From

Reaching out and saving you

Before it's too late

I am not from

Always having a great life

Does anyone?

I am From

Divorced parents,

Fighting and flying back and forth,

Each summer a different conflict arising.

I am From

Two great dogs,

Passing away less than a year apart,

One was five, diagnosis was cancer.

The other was old, 14 to be exact.

I am From

Losing my mom,

Too early to be justified.

36 and she went to sleep one night,

Never woke up.

I am From

Going through Hell,

And somehow,

Finding the strength to get back out.

I am From

Being depressed,

Having thoughts of uselessness,

Never knowing my true purpose of life

Wondering, "What do I do?"

I am From

Life moving on,

Weather or not I was ready.

It happens.

I am From

A tortured childhood,

But the mask I wear,

Is the smile on my face.

I am From

Hiding it all,

Behind the warm smile that I share,

Even if my eyes give me away.

I am From

Giving in to the coward,

When all I have to say, is

"I am not okay."