I Am Wrong

A poem dedicated to you, mama. 

When did it begin? 

When did I begin to resist your kisses, your hugs, your love? 

When did I stop seeing you as a beautiful person? 

but an ugly fat lady?

When did the yelling begin? 

When did the hate start? 

Was it because you did not protect me from the hands of my stepdad?

I remember, 

I was thirteen. 

We lived in that old, trashy, tiny apartment. 

Life finally has gotten better. 

Now I am Twenty, 

I realized you are all I've got on this world.

I am wrong for resisting your kisses, your hugs, your love.

I am wrong for seeing you as ugly and fat.

I am wrong for seeing you through a judgmental lens. 

I am wrong for yelling at you out of annoyance. 

I am wrong for blaming you. 

Forgive me, mama. 

"I love you too" is said from my heart every time.