i can still rememberthe feel

i can still remember
the feel of your head in my hand
as i kissed you passionately,
offering you every piece of my heart.

i did so willingly,
knowing you were planning
on ripping it out of my chest.

i felt it, i tasted it,
i saw it weeks before you did it,
but as i looked at you,
you never changed.

your words remained the same,
still as sweet as the honey
that trembles on the edge
of a lover’s lips.

your touch,
still as soft as the rain
that conceals an approaching storm.

i knew you were going to leave,
but i stayed.

i watched the death of us
a million times over,
but nothing hurts worse
than hearing you in real time
say you don’t want me.

how did we get here?
i still love you.