I Didn't Realize

I didn't realize how much you meant to me. Until summer was over and so were we. When I finally caught on to the fact that our fun, little romance had expired because it was only meant to last in this universe for a moment. 

I didn't realize how much you meant to me. Until it was a year later and when I thought I'd stepped away from the thought of us, I felt a tugging on my skin. You had stuck your hooks so deep inside of me that I still hadn't gotten them out. With every move and every step, I felt your gravitational pull pull harder on me. 

I didn't realize how much you meant to me.  Until you got with her and I could feel every inch of my body sadden. I found myself comparing myself to her just to find out how I lost your attention. All I wanted was to have you back in my world. 

I didn't realize how much you meant to me. Until I picked you up at 2am because you were drunk. The whole car ride to your house we talked like we used to and you held my hand like you used to. You made me laugh and told me how pretty I was. You told me you'd written me a song, but couldn't find the piece of paper you'd decided to pour it into. 

I didn't realize how much you meant to me. Until you called me to talk about the physics homework and I didn't want you to say goodbye. I could've listened to you talk about motion and sound waves all night long if I had to, just to hear your voice again. But you hung up because she called you. 

I didn't realize how much you meant to me. Until we only had soft smiles and glances to one another in the halls. I might even get up the courage to say hello now and then, pretending like those words didn't take an army of 7000 men to push out. 

I didn't realize how much you meant to me. Until it was too late.