I do not like you

June 21, 2016

I do not like the feeling

Of words trapped in my chest

Lungs sticky with smoke and regret

I do not like the feeling

Of my stomach being pulled out through

My lips and fed back in again

I do not like the feeling

Of my nerves zapping

Of the bonds holding my molecules together

Slowly breaking

Atoms shaking

I do not like the feeling and I wish to feel no more

I do not like the feeling of helplessness

Knowing that I have no control

Over the synapses in my brain

And yet my feelings are invalidated

Because why should I have to medicate myself to stay mentally balanced when children are dying of starvation

I do not like the feeling

Of guilt twisting up my spine

And crawling through my stomach

I do not like the feeling

Of tears behind my eyes and thoughts jammed into my skull

And I do not like the feeling of pitying glances

Because I am not a sob story

And I do not like the feeling

Of discrimination

Because you wouldn't deny a sick person their antibiotics

But when someone has a Serotonin imbalance

Suddenly insanity is certain

___

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