I Don't Exist

No one ever hears me. I could be in a room full of people and just disappear in the background. I am literally forgettable . People have actually come into a room and ignored my whole being to the point where they don't even see me anymore. I am invisible. That's how unimportant my value has become ,that's how insignificant I am to the world around me, unless of course they need my help, I am only visible when needed. That is why I am always so loud because I fear that if I am not screaming on the top of my lungs people won't even see me, that they will just walk right past me and never ever glance at me and just literally forget that I was ever even there. I begin to ask myself why am I so invisible? why can no one ever hear me? people cant even hear me even when I am screaming so loud that I out shout the loudest megaphone. The voice inside me is so boisterous and loud yet it just shrinks away when I speak. Why cant my voice fill a room like the best gospel choir? instead it just goes mute. I am always ignored, forgotten and unheard people have actually forgotten that I was even in the room. the worst part is that it has happened so often that it no longer bothers me...I ...even begin to not notice me...