I FOUND ME IN DARK PLACES

June 9, 2016

I Found Me IN DARK PLACES

I cried last night why you was on the phone
I cried this morning when I had let you go
And this night you I cried out of my mind ,
I wrapped myself in misery and sat alone in the dark
Holding the other part of my heart of the unknown
Feeling my despair and loneliness .
But I know this was for the best you just don't know this yet
Take note of this I don't want to be in love yet ,
I don't want a marriage yet that will be so much regrets for me ,
You must know never to put your heart on hold .
Move on please and let me go !
Today I have not been acting my usual self you see
But my heart is finly free that is what my heart needs ,
the universe is vast in love ,
I am in the void of loneliness ,
I do set and look at the stars thinking about were you are ,
Paris is were my heart wanted to be .
But given my all to just one it set my heart on run ,
I am still young not read for that yet ,
I can handle love to a degree ,
But my heart needs to love freely ,
I am used to being a lone with a big world around me I cold home ,
I 'm just starting to find me ,
I know I am in my forties but my heart is still young
And it wants to move on ,
I gave my all to others very young in life ,
And I learned how to let others walk all over me and let them live out my dreams.
But not this time I started learning how to love me and live out my own life
And learning to find me and setting out my own dreams ,
Then when my heart is ready for love it will be on easy ,
I don't want to be alone tonight but this is life ,
I had made loneliness my best friend .
I realized that I am were I need to be and that is free ,
I would call to Paris but I know not !
The key to a semi-happy life is simply not for me .
I need sufficient distraction of true happiness and that's when I found me .
Balance of passion and love and energy I already had it,
so I distracted myself ,shook off all my pains that others gave
And I just walked away and find my world for me to being.
My gravity pulling sadness to happiness .
I learn to love me and live my own life and set my heart free .

Lilly Emery (C)

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Poetic Judy Lilly Emery

To all my readers you may see that their are grammar errors in my old writings, but these writing are from the 90's ,2000's. I truly didn't think anyone was readying my work . so I just started writing out what I felt and made my pains a story and poems . I had re post these poems and stories all over the internet and I keep them also in file so no one can ever say my work is theirs . I have kept my work as they are just for others to see where it was I started my writing at . The pains are so real not even a game ,The life I had lived I would never wish upon no one . I like to say to all who are taking the steps for change in their life congratulations to the new open doors God bless you . You may have seen my photos on the internet and my writings on Poetry.com and poem hunter etc. you may have seen the hate that others have given to me about my work and my beauty of who I am . But as you can see I will never let the haters Stop me from doing what I love . So I say the same to all of you write your own words and let your heart speak to all your readers . I hope you can understand why I haven't made changes in my work at less not the old ones . My old work are left as they are for me to always remember where it all came from . God bless to all who reads . Lilly Emery /Judy Emery

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