i grew up

April 24, 2019

long days faded into equally long nights

i wasn't greeted by nighttime frights

i was greeted by the booming reality

of wanting to be: older.

get a job they groaned

be more responsible they moaned

what happened?

to the love i used to receive

every day grew more intense

work increased

my mental stability decreased

everything that seemed so light and happy

deceived my every wish

because my brother smoked weed

my dad blows through cigarettes like a newly found piece of candy

and he thought it would be handy

to blow through all of their money gambling.

my little sister

was my responsibility

and i had to watch her to the best of my little kid ability.

my parents dread

was stuck in my head

clouding my every thought.

i think a lot.

i grew up too fast.

i wish;

i was able to have been a kid

the bliss would've been nice

if it had stayed a few more nights

to greet me with my sanity.

so,

we dream of what it would be like to be grown up

but in reality it kind of sucks.

especially when you were never a kid.

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