Why am I afraid to speak?
Why am I afraid to prove I've excelled,
Out of misguided fear that I'll appear single-celled?
Success is what happens when you reach your peak,
So why then, teacher, am I scared to speak?
Doctors say anxiety, depression, and more,
All I know is I wind up catatonic on the floor.
Overcome by stress and pressure and it all,
Knowing the fate that would follow my fall.
College is no option. It's a path I must take...
So society's said it's for my own sake.
But what about later? What about when
I'm deeply in debt and tired as sin?
I never knew I'd struggle in academics this way
I'm smart, I'm special, is what they always say.
I was raised to believe so before there was ever a peek
Of the girl who would grow up to be terrified to speak.
Mistakes are a part of life, sure, that's true.
But why are my failings so disappointing to you?