I Just Need A Day

Dear Heavenly Father,

I just need a day,

A day to myself,

A day to reflect, reminisce, remember,

A day to think about life since...

...Since I gave my life to You,

Since I decided to follow You,

Since I chose to rely on You.

That was the best year of my life,

Completely devoted to what You wanted,

Completely devoted to what You had in store for me,

Completely devoted to Your will.

A lot has changed since then.

It happened so gradually,

It happened without me realizing,

It happened inside me.

I changed.

Somehow I no longer wanted what You wanted,

Somehow I no longer wanted what You had in store for me,

Somehow I no longer cared for Your will.

I know I have to go back.

I hate my life without You.

I hate my decisions without You.

I hate who I've become without You.

I can't do it alone.

I've tried to force myself,

I've tried to change myself,

I've tried, but many times I don't want to.

So, I need a day,

A day to myself with You,

A day to remember, reconnect, recommit,

A day to come back to You.

I just need a day...

Love,

Nwanyi