I Know

It’s raining

I know cause my hair is frizzy

And the air has that lush green smell

I can’t see through any windows

But I can hear the gentle drip

The lights pouring in have reached a soft darkness

It’s raining 

I know it’s raining 

But I won’t check

I won’t look out the window

It’s raining 

I know cause you like to sit next to me

And when we part you hold my hand a bit before you let go

I’m scared to be alone

And you might know

It raining and you love me

You’ve even said the words

But those are just words you say

Just words

I won’t ask 

“what do you mean when you say I Love You?”

Fuck I could never

I’m warm 

I have that soft feeling in my chest that simultaneously aches and makes me smile

I hope the way I hoped back then

Like a dirty hungry street dog

I’ll say the words back 

because I mean them 

but only quietly

After all I’m scared to be alone

I want what you say to be the truth

I want 

I want

I want

I’ve always been an open wound

“Feel free to stab me in heart”

I’ll just never mention the bleeding

Because I’ve heard I love you before

Those are just words you say

Just words

I know that too 

That’s where all the blood is coming from

Right there

Gushing out the side of my chest

A dirty hungry street dog who always gets left behind

I should ask, what you mean

Because I don’t want to be the “dirty hungry street do who always gets left behind”

That’s not really ideal

So I should ask

I should look out the window

Just to check