I know what I am

I remember deciding I was awesome, and that

was all that mattered.

I remember thinking others were bossy,

Crying because I was called the same.

I remember being better than my classmates, finishing first,

grading their papers, reading stories more interesting than them.

I remember Brandon telling people not to be in a group with me.

“She'll make you do work.”

I remember adults telling me I was special.

“You’ll go one to great things” “I’ll vote for you when you run for President”

I remember never questioning what I am.

I remember being ahead of my class, and I remember the first time

I fell behind. I remember becoming average.

Ginny finished first, Nathan got a higher grade, Ethan understood the work better.

What am I?

I remember my parents still being proud.

But anything not number one, wasn’t good enough for me.

I remember crying because I wasn’t the smartest. What am I?

I remember adults telling me I was normal.

“We are all normal” “You’re not a genius, you’re not gifted”

I remember being confused. What am I?

I remember becoming an adult.

Thinking about what I am. Who I'm not.

I remember not feeling any different. But feeling completely new.

Working on presenting myself as he.

Recalling what I decided I was so long ago, I realized

I remember still being awesome.