I need Money

I need help paying for college.

Let's look at this mathematically.

Now, a good college = Time x Money.

Everybody knows that Time = Money.

So, a good college = (money)^2

Coincidence that this equations makes a sad face?

No. People don't like to spend their money.

Because of the fact that money is the root of all problems.

Meaning, Money = sqrt(problems)

When you embed this equation to the previous one, the squares cancel out.

Finishing off with college = problems.

Now what problems could they be?

Debt? Family Disputes? Loans? THERE ARE SO MANY PROBLEMS!

There isn't just one problem, and I need money.