As I reflect

I done went up the mountain and uh i even back slid became a product of my environment I hopeless told God that I hope this life don't last forever why am I still here I know that there's something better than the chedder wanting aks glocks and Berettas just to increase my chances of dying and waking feds up fed up with my perception rejection in this society hard to wake those days and to live in total sobriety it seemed the only way to make it be a notoriety my view gotta be different I'm missing the bigger picture tried to talk to God before hit the sheets quoting scripture next day blowing out smoke holding my liqueur plotting on a come up sell drugs or do a stick up my brother taught me how to bag up and even hold a gun forgot who taught me to pray and I should know the son but it was innate to see the cops and know you sposed to run if they chase we stayed blazed with murder in our lungs looking to sky asking God is there a better way he said there is wanna to see it? then you better change it's kinda strange how the pain keep me motivated almost buried me in my shame look how i cultivated knowledge is power and my ignorance was my destruction my own obstruction refused to follow those wise instructions that was giving while living in sin my life was ending before it began feels good to know all of my losses prepared me to win