I still Remember You

Sometimes I still hear you Your feet whispering on the carpet Treading softly so that you didn’t wake anyone You always woke me I never wanted to miss a moment with you I can still remember The soft gravelly tones of your voice As you whispered secrets to me Before we were anything besides the best friends in the world I remember The way your mouth would twitch Right before you were about to cheat at cards I always caught you And you never knew how I always won You let me win every time I remember How you couldn’t tie a tie And ran to your mother whenever you needed one I remember when you ran to me instead for the first time I remember our first kiss When you were dared, and couldn’t back down Only eight years old A quick peck on the cheek And honor was satisfied I remember The other first one Right after you asked me out A slow gentle one And how you whispered afterwards That you’d been wanting to do that for a long time I remember How I’d been thinking the same thing I remember When we first shifted from best friends Who would take on the world together To a couple We’d last forever Conquering together I remember Everyday that we did Everyday that you survived Stealing just a little more time Just in case you’d forgotten to tell me you loved me I remember how you never did I remember How afraid you were of the dark And of silence We’d talk for hours And have music on all the time With a special night light So you’d never have to be afraid Not here I still leave it on Because now it reminds me of you I remember How devastated you were When we found out That we couldn’t have kids Just in case They would have to struggle as much as you I remember Thinking how glad I was That your parents took the risk Even though they lost I remember having you I remember How you wouldn’t take the risk And I said we could adopt So we did The most beautiful baby girl And then another boy Were ours I remember how you wouldn’t tell them And were strong for them A giant who never failed To be there I remember how much pain you felt But would never show for them I saw it all I remember Raising those kids together And knowing how hard you were trying To just stay and be alive You made it long enough To watch them both get married I remember Being in awe As to how long you could survive Just for the people you loved I remember Loving you more for it I remember how we fought Wild screaming matches That always ended in laughter Because after the kids were here Our screams were actually whispers So that we wouldn’t scare the kids I remember Being so angry with you when I was away And forgetting what we it was about As soon as I saw you again I remember Those very last days When you’d disappear for hours When I asked you where you went You said I’d find out later And I did After you were gone I remember Going on a walk My face streaming with tears Remembering A thousand little things I remember finding our bench The one you’d built 30 years before A cocky little eighth grader You annoyed me so much that year But you built me a bench anyways Because I’d always said I wanted one I remember sitting there Wishing for you to be with me Just one more time I remember laying down And looking up I remember Catching my breath My heart stopping And beginning again Because you’d made a little roof And pasted pictures of us On the entire thing I remember looking around Because I could've sworn you were laughing at me For beating me at being there I remember How your very last words Were I Love You I remember How as soon as I saw those pictures I realized just how much you really did I still remember that I still Love you I wish you were here I remember when you were I’ll never forget you.