I Thought Too Much

I can't help but think of the moment

When my loved ones will be gone, it will be over

When I won't have a wall or cover

When I lose my final lover

I know that pen and paper will be my solace

But life will be over more or less

Sure I'll have ideas and words full of pain

Flooding through the gates inside my brain

But it will be a vicious attack

That won't lack the proper tactical advantages

To tear me down from the inside and out

Till nothing's left but a sound

A whisper of a voice crying out from the dark

You can't tell it and silence apart

But it's there and you need to take care

To focus and not let distractions drown it out

Because it's got a message nobody can live without

And the message is simple, a common principle

And it is this list:

"Be sure to live like you won't see tomorrow,

"Run like you've got someone important to follow,

"And be sure to love and show mercy like you've got no pride to swallow."

Yes, live like this, live for today

Though I can't promise things will go your way

But one thing's certain

If you do this your curtain call

Shall not fall too soon

Your story will be told for generations under the moon

At least I hope that's how it is

That's just what I've been told

Maybe I'll feel different once I've actually gotten old

I want to be remembered

Don't let me be forgotten

Please tell about my world of blue grass

And how my fingers were always cold

Tell them that I did my best to love and be kind

Tell them all the story of how I tried, mind

The fact the words didn't always come out right

I may be a wordsmith, but let's face it

I'm very pretentious and imperfect

Pretentious is not a word to take lightly

Because it actually is a trait that hides the fear inside

Failure and fear of rejection covered by cockiness and 'perfection'

Idealistic words hiding the shame for myself

Because I don't love me, just like everybody else

We're all just trying to make it in this cruel, material world

We're all in the mud, trying to listen to the voice you recently heard

Something about living for today and living like you'll die

Which you will; that's why you must strengthen your ties

To the people who'll go later, so they'll think

Think of you and reminisce on the times they miss

Of your smiling face and the sugar coated words

That fell from your mouth to the earth

Poisoning the land because you can't the things you've said back again

Oh, there I am again, so very pretentious

Acting as if you're worse than me

Even though, in the end, we're all the same

Man, woman, gay, in between, straight,

Smart, dumb, old, young, color of skin or weight

Does not matter in the end of all things

Whatever god you believe in does not mean

You won't die in the end and that your body

Won't become a part of the dirt one day

That's how we're the same

We're all going to die and-

Oh. I said too much again, with my imperfect mouth

Sorry. I suppose I shouldn't have come out

I just think far too much about the grand scheme of things

Wondering what tomorrow will bring for me

Obsessed with my future and legacy

Now maybe you will wonder too

I'm sorry I thought too much

I'll see you when we make our final adieus

 

This poem is about: 
Me
Our world

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