I try, I fail, I

I try, I fail, I am me 

 

Have you ever wanted something so bad to the point of killing yourself without it? 

Have you ever believed in something so much that you would kill to get it? 

I have thought about things I want so many times over and have shrugged them off thinking that im not worth it or that to get them is to hard. 

People tell me they understand and know how i feel, well how do you? Your not me. Im me. I know exactly how I feel and what goes through my mind. People try to befriend me so they can make me hurt make me feel pain. Why? What did I do to them to deserve their hate? I try to be good and follow the rules. I try to be smart and helpful. I try to be courageous. Im none of those things. Im all of them. Stab a knife in my back ill either get up and slit your throat or ill get up, turn around, and say you missed a spot. I can hold a door for you or shut it in your face. I can tell the truth or lie to hurt you or keep you safe. I can protect and defeat, put you down or raise you up. I am me. If you trust me then trust that I will keep it until you do not deserve it any longer. I will pick you up and hold you high until you let me fall. If you must trust me the trust this, I am good, but i can be so bad, i have a good heart, a good mind, and a good soul but when the time comes I will be bad as long as I need to put my point across. I will fight till my last breath. I will do everything in my power to see that what I fight for will go down in history. I will never give up and never back down. Im not perfect, I fuck up a lot. But hey thats what were supposed to do. Like it or not I learn from my fuck ups. But weather I change myself is up to me. I like not being perfect. I like being me. If you dont like it say it to my face and if you dont and I find out you better watch your back cause they'll be a red dot on it. Bang!  

 

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