I want to be...

When life gets hard, I think with my eyes closed "What if I weren't black, is that the pigment i would've chose?" Then I see my little sisters, things become so clear... Even though we are different skin tones, they hold me so dear I look at their eyes, their faces, their smile Their brother is black....the only dark skinned child The oldest at that, out of 9 kids....yep nine Whenever these dark thoughts plague my head, they shine Every trayvon martin case I see, every black person that dies Through an injustice act, covered by a "felt threatened" guise I question my want to be black, in this world of white But then my sister calls me, just to tell me she loves me Then I think to myself...my sister isn't the only one that loves me All of my family, regardless of tone love me to death, to the core , to the bone So...I should love myself, I mean its only right. I will love whatever makes my sister happy, for my family are the love of my life. So I want to be what my family is in love with I want to be the short, glasses wearing little black kid I want to be the nerd they come to for help with math and crooked teeth But most of all, I want to be...the boy that is loved by his family. I want to be...me