I'd look so much better...

I'd look so much better without a face.

I've got the body,

but there's always something more to erase.

I look in the gray reflection of the window in the door

And I try and figure out if there is something more.

I want to change myself,

but these are drastic changes.

It's more than exercise and surgery,

it's cuts in some places.

But I feel that even dying wouldn't be enough.

I tell myself all the time

to change some things around in my mind

but I am stuck in this place where even I can't yell loud enough to reach me.

I need someone to assure me,

but I'll just call them a lier.

I know I'd just push away, but I still want someone to hold me tighter.

I'm an addict for dramatics, and you all think it's probably my fake saddness

but these are real thoughts of a girl tired of the anticcs.