If I Were Less Afraid

If I were less afraid I would have turned myself inside out and shown you even the darkest sublevels of my conscience.

 I would have scooped out my thoughts

Like the innards of a pumpkin

And laid them all on a table for you to pick out the seeds

I would have told you that I loved you

Even though I don’t believe in love

Only prolonged tolerance

If I were less afraid I would have un-jumbled all the words

So that I could’ve let you know

That you made me think the cheesiest things

Like your eyes made the stars look like cheap Christmas lights

Pasted to the ceiling of the world

But words don’t mean anything

Because if I were less afraid

You still would have left me

You still would have grown wings

As I waited on the ground

To shoot you down with a gun full of nothing

 If I were less afraid I would get a tattoo

Of the quotes from the books I’ve read that made me think of you

But the problem is there are probably a hundred or two

And I don’t think I could pick just a few

Because I read books like it’s all I can do

Because people tell lies but the writings all true

If I were less afraid I would say this to your face

Instead of some computer screen