If Only You Knew

Why is it

So easy

For you to break me 

Why can't you see

The way your words

Ruin me

Would you ever believe

Could you ever understand

Why it feels like

Loving you

Risking it all

Betting all I have

On a love

That never took off

That never reached the sun

You crushed me

Underneath

The weight

You laid on me

Reaching for you

In dreams

That never end

Go in endless circles

A nightmare

Loving you

All these years

All I do

For you

Giving up

Giving in

You get by

And you win

Always and forever

I can't shake it

It's 4 am

And I'm wide awake

And yet

You sleep soundly beside me

I'm dying

Right in front of you

And you have no idea

No clue

But God

If only you knew