ignoranceisbliss
I think it's better if I don't know, so I won't have the urge to jump out of the window and pray that I die quickly. I have pain because I ask too many questions and I seek to know the unknown, when sometimes I wish I could not be apart of anything, so I won't be hurt. Ignorance is bliss. Sometimes you have to be a coward and hide from the idiocracy to discover light and peace in your own life. From Instagram, to Twitter and Facebook, I learn too much and I find out too much, when all I really want to do is obtain peace. Sometimes, I have that feeling that I want to leave and never come back, just so I could be by myself and not shed another tear because of someone else affecting me. But other times, I wish I was the girl I was back in middle school with a bad mouth and could stand up for herself. I wish I could handle what I used to handle. Now, I'm lying to myself. All I want to do is accept the fact that my lies to myself could come true, which comes back to ignorance is bliss. Didn't understand why Kendrick said it so long ago, but I get it now. Back then, I didn't want to throw everything around me. Now, I want to burn it with me inside the flames. Wish I didn't know if I was getting used or not. Ignorance is bliss. Wish I had no doubts when it comes to the ones I care about. Ignorance is bliss. Wish I stopped hearing the things I hear people say about me. Ignorance is bliss. Wish I would've known in September to hold his hand and give him another chance. Ignorance is bliss. Even though he would've fucked me over, he's great at hiding his fuck-ups. Ignorance is bliss. Wish the tears would have a new reason to slip down my face instead of the same old song. Ignorance is bliss. I wish I could continue, finish, hurry along. Ignorance is bliss. I wish that I could be invisible, so I could hide from the truths that I never want to face. Ignorance is bliss. Because paying attention is the reason why I'm even stuck in this place.
I hate him, don't even talk to him. Ignorance is bliss. Even though there's one that I'm scared about. Ignorance is bliss. I trust too many people with my mind. Ignorance is bliss. Because I was so foolish, I thought they would never leave me behind. I thought that it would always be us, but I guess that's not the case. Me and you forever? Nahh, I say that only to your face. But if you have interest in a guy, that's a total disgrace. My best friend is bi. She can't trust people. I'm straight and quiet, without any friends my color. Because I'm sheltered by ignorance. My race shouldn't matter...but it does.
It does. The only people that will fully get where you're coming from are the people that know your struggles. But ignorance is bliss. The more I don't know, the more I'm sheltered, the more I'll be safe.
I'd rather not know.
Rather not know that the one person that's special to me fucks with my feelings, while I sit on the side and act like I don't care.
Rather not know that I won't be able to go to the college of my dreams because we're too broke to afford it.
Rather not know that my chances of succeeding in life are low because of the shade of my skin and my ancestry.
Rather not know that I'm underweight and not what society thinks is normal.
Rather not know that I have severe depression and if I went it the doctor, they'd pile me up on meds.
Rather not know that my moral decisions are so bad that my best friend isn't even my friend anymore.
Rather not know that I single-handedly fucked up my life because of some decisions I've made.
Because ignorance is bliss.