Illusions of Love

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22203
United States

Your heart was drooling with love

I softened in the nectar of your affection
And I bathed in rhythms of your voice
I didn’t know how big my heart was
Until paradise seeped into my sleeve
I gave you more love than I had ever given myself

 

That was when I began to taste sin in your soft eyes

I indulged in the idea that even I too can fall madly in love

With someone as chaotic as you

I wanted my soul smeared across your lips

And my body pouring out of your arms

A love so intense

That it trembled in every heartbeat

A dreamer can dream and I dreamed of you

 

I fell in love with the idea of you

The illusion that you could love me as much as I loved you
Heaven began to crumble underneath your feet
I no longer saw love in your eyes
You ached with hunger

And so I fed you morsels of my dreams
I was losing myself trying to find you


It took me a long time to realize that I am the essence of love
To not love me meant that you had not loved yourself
I hunger for a love that is whole  

A love that is drenched in the elixir of passion, trust and intimacy
I poured my love into a cup
And drank it with delight
Until I overflowed with the love you could never give me
 

You can only love me if you love yourself
I didn’t know how to love when I met you
I watched my mother drown in the absence of love

And my father crave the warmth of love
I can only love you if I love myself

I crave a love that craves me
A love that fulfills me

Because I love you

I had to learn to let you go

Because I love you

I had to learn to love me

 

This poem is about: 
Me
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