Immune to happiness

My head is underwater
I fear that sharks will come
My legs are being forced to push up not down
I began to sink
I try to find a solution using my legs
But I can't think of anything else
I'm trapped, only seeing the bad
The good...Isn't identified
My mind is corrupting a river
The ocean pushes me deeper
Now my head is wet
My eyes are blurry

No one is near
No one can hear my muffled voiced out mouth drained with the oceans spit
I close my eyes, picturing me sitting in my room petting my cat
His purr grows louder and louder
Then it stops when I open my eyes
I though of something I'm gonna miss
Something I want
And now it's gone
Everything is gone