Inescapable Normality

I question why I taste normality in my tears

Even when free of sadness and fears

The essence of crying of course brings misery

Yet even in happiness, seems to have an overwhelming sense of familiarity 

One thought spawns multitudes, I begin realizing

The sorrow of my downfalls, and of my uprisings

One thought awakens my mind

Together memories wad and weave, beginning to bind

I am returned once more to hateful thoughts filled with sorrow

From times in my life, when I was hollow

But is it the same doubt and pain

The belief there is nothing left in life to gain

Are these thoughts what brings droplets of remorse?

Or is there an alternate source?

Perhaps the droplets are instead the result of regret

For losing so much of my life to melancholy, to events on which I now reflect

So why truly do I taste normality in tears?

Even when free of sadness and fears