Inside My Head
I'll stand here out in the open.
arms wide, stance strong, my thoughts are out on the table
yup, that's me
all me
just me
I'm done hiding, I'm done lying, I'm done hurting
that animal locked inside my head
ripping at my skull
SCREAMING
I want. Her. Gone. now.
those voices that soothed me with darkness
promises of silence
“just take 10 more steps”
And you’ll be free of pain
“just take 9 more steps”
And you won’t have to worry
“just take 8 more steps”
And you’ll never be lonely
“just take 7 more step”
No one will miss you
“just take 6 more steps”
Trust me
"just take 5 more steps"
and confront that steel beast
"just take 4 more steps"
but that's not confrontation
"just take 3 more steps"
that's escaping through a back door
"2 more steps"
left unlocked
"almost there"
in my lonely head
NO!
I'm going to confront it
Head on
but not through death, through life
I’m done screaming inside my head while my mouth stays shut
Done pulling down my sleeves to conceal my hurt
I will tell you
I AM NOT OKAY
but I will get there
with you at my side
the side you never left
I was never truly alone
It was all
inside
my
head