Intrusive thoughts

The intrusive thoughts pile up 

“You’re pointless”

“You’re a failure”

“You’re a reject”

“Everyone hates you”

“You’re hopelessly unlikeable”

“You don’t deserve that feeling of fulfillment you crave”

“You’re stupid for craving it so desperately”

“You don’t even deserve to feel this pain”

“You don’t even deserve to be alive”

I feel pathetic, I shouldn’t be feeling so sorry for myself 

“toughen up”

“Stop being a bitch”

“Stop being a pussy”

“Act like a man”

my mind goes into combat with itself as my intrusive thoughts abuse my soul 

I lie down exhausted and defeated 

I can’t breathe 

I’m suffocating 

Can I please get some air?

“You don’t deserve it”