Isaac

Dear Judit,

Life is supposed to be the greatest miracle of life. Seeing that little baby, eyes shut, crying is supposed to be the happiest part of anyone’s life.  But what are you supposed to do when that baby doesn’t come out of the womb crying, or without fully developed eyes. It happened again....

My Mom took all the precautions, so it wouldn't happen a second time, I even gave her crap about the little things she was doing.  The hardest part about this is not getting to know him.  I’m not even sure if I am supposed to sad, angry or happy.  I know that I should be sad, and I already cried, but what for, because it was a life that never got to see the world or that I lost another brother.  We never got to hear his voice, got to know what he looked like, what he might become, would he look more like my Mom or Dad, who would be his favorite brother?  There are so many question that I think of every time I think of them. My mom thinks that god always has a plan and that’s is why it has happened, but what was the plan? I think was supposed to bring us closer a family, but why do it a second time?  I don’t know if you know this, but I don’t know how to deal with sympathy and every time they are somehow brought up in a conversation I don’t know who to deal with it.

What do you think gods plan was? I wished I knew how to deal with this kind of situation, but it’s hard you know.

Sincerely,

Juanantonio Ruiz