Is It Selfish?

Is it selfish of me to ask for the happy you? 

The life-of-the-party you? 

The you that didn’t hurt me? The you that cared? 

I want him back ‘cause the other you makes me scared

After months of waiting 

You came into town 

I didn't know what to expect

Cause we fought the last time you were around 

Walking around paranoid 

didn't know if id see you 

I heard you were talking to my girls

I wonder which one you’d choose 

Next thing i know 

We’re together in a car 

No eye contact or speaking 

It felt like we drove so far 

All of those things you said

Felt so long ago 

When we started talking 

It felt a bit like home 

The past didn’t come up

But the emotions were still there 

I wish we hadn't said those things 

‘Cause i know you still care 

Our eyes locked in conversation

You said more than words could 

I miss you too, but that doesn’t fix it. 

‘Cause for me you’re far from good. 

You had a feather on your back 

It was distracting and white 

I wanted to grab it

But i didn’t cause that wouldn’t be right. 

Is it selfish of me to ask for the happy you? 

The life-of-the-party you? 

The you that didn’t hurt me? The you that cared? 

I want him back ‘cause the other you makes me scared

I want you back in my life

But not the bad shit, ya feel?

Show up for the party but i don't want your number 

Just for you to keep it real. 

I’m a trooper, I aint like her 

I forgive and forgive but that’s not how you live 

You like the excitement, to be on the edge

When it comes at a cost, you’re not one to forgive. 

You want me to feel sorry and apologize

You like the attention, all eyes on you. 

You want me to get on my knees and bow down 

Until i hate myself and everything i’ve been through. 

Is it selfish of me to ask for the happy you? 

The life-of-the-party you? 

The you that didn’t hurt me? The you that cared? 

I want him back ‘cause the other you makes me scared