Jakayla Was Here

While he painted her face with different tones of blue blotches of purple’s many shades interrupted by dripping red clear lines streaming down Jakayla was here assisting Crayola in creating her own utopia Covering white walls with friendly horses she could ride far away from here and teddy bears who would wipe away all her tears Gardens of flowers that made blues, purples, and reds gorgeous like their brightness was a response to the Carolina cardinals singing in the morning While he shaved her head without a razor then used wine-stained carpets to brush her hair shards of glass to comb it Jakayla was here While screams bellowed from the pit of her stomach without a word shouting to the masses that being beaten by the man you love is more painful than childbirth Jakayla was here still trying to find calm among their chaos adding trees and clear skies hoping that somewhere she could find the face of God trying to imagine a different life Soon she’d give up on the power of crayons While her mother’s body whispered without a word just limp limbs eyes swollen shut tears dried and subtle groans that she was now numb to his fists and tired of struggling again and again Jakayla was here and so she wouldn’t get in trouble she Mr. Cleaned every dream off the wall It was in that moment the tears began to fall Jakayla was here in a make-shift asylum she made the white pillow absorb her snot-filled sobs so they wouldn’t bounce off the white walls of the clothes-less closet So he wouldn’t hear her But somehow he did While he stumbled up the stairs His body bouncing back and forth Leaning, tripping, stumbling Getting closer and closer Jakayla was here chipping paint first the J then the a By the time she got to spelling here there he was He bent her over pressed her head against the door so hard it left an indent Jakayla was here His sweaty palms pushed her lower fingernails scratching walls on the way down New marks made Jakayla was here Now laying on the ground trying to distract herself from the hurt of body parts being manipulated to stretch in ways they had never done before She wrote it again Jakayla was here In so many ways Jakayla is still there