It has conditioned me to fear

To fear everything life has to offer

To see the bad side of every situation

To doubt even the simplest acts of kindness

This monster has created a shell of a person

Where trust no longer exists

Where I am a shaking child on the inside

This creature has made

Even the simplest human emotions

Impossible

There is no trust

No hope

No love

No happiness

There is only doubt and panic

How do I escape this shell of a person?

The person I’ve become.

The one defined by my disorders

The one’s Tumblr has made out to be good traits…

My depression is not beautiful

My anxiety is not adorable

My eating disorders are not glamorous

My life is not a story

There are no happy endings

Especially not for the damaged girl

Tumblr has created this story

That is meant to give us hope

But all it has done is snuff out what I had left

My friends are out of the loop

They have more important issues

They are worth more than myself

They have futures

I’m not sure I do anymore

I keep on for them

For my family

I have a small hope

To overcome this beast

That has sat on my shoulders since middle school

I believe this is the first step

Towards the pin prick of light

That I can finally see at the end of this dark tunnel