Journeys on Two Paths

Men and women are stripped of their liberties when they are born and when they die

You and I cannot choose the circumstances of our births or deaths

They are impossibly beyond our feeble and limited control

In those two inevitable and unforeseeable situations, we are completely powerless

Then is all of mankind without power or control?

As I confronted the truth, I began to believe that I had no power or control

I believed that I would also be deprived of my freedoms

That I would become one with the infinitely vast nothing of the Universe

With or without me, the Universe would continue to create and destroy for all time

Routine and mundane tasks dulled my mind

Trivial work softened my body

Familiar songs and voices silenced my thoughts

The ordinary blinded my eyes

The world became gray.

It’s the same world we see on television daily

It’s the same world we hear about on podcasts and the radio

It’s the same world we read about on the internet

It’s the same

My nights stretched to impossible lengths entombing me in stillness

My thoughts whispered to me my worries, my doubts, my failures, my weaknesses, my fear

What used to be my sanctuary now perished and was destitute

Two wells formed deep within the darkness; I treaded lightly into the quiet

I fell into the wells. The wells of sorrow and fury.

Sorrow extinguished the sun’s light and cast an unending pestilence upon the earth

Thrown into despair, I lost all hope

Fury blackened the heavens and cursed the moon

Consumed with hatred, I ceased to live

The wells reached deep and protruded into the cold, still darkness

I stopped falling and began swimming down into the depths

The wells deceived all my senses until I only knew the truth in the wells

Soon the wells warmed with the heat of the body and shined with the light of the mind

At the bottom, I stilled my heart. I gazed into the darkness. Beneath the bottom was Death and Hell.

The world of unimaginable pain and unending torture lay underneath my hands

The end laid its hand on my shoulder and peered with me forward

I fell into my final despair; I blazed with the ultimate hatred

I could not break the bottom of the wells.

I lied down at the bottom

The earth was warm

The heavens were peaceful

I looked up

I saw light.

The light that inspired artists and dreamers to create and envision life

The light that guided the strong and hungry to success and wealth

The light that produced the great and awesome to lead the world

The light that once shone on my back

From the bottom, the light was out of reach

Unfathomably deep in the darkness, the light was dim

I stared blankly at the other end of the wells

Only a small portion of the light shined down here and with only a fraction of its brightness

Was I truly powerless?

Was there nothing I could do?

Was I really meant to become another nameless, faceless person?

Without a purpose, what could I possibly do?

Without a dream, what life could I live?

My course had been smooth and clear

There were no storms in the sky or within the ocean

Yet, here I was, lying at the bottom of two wells

Here in the abyss, I confronted the truth again. Another part of the Truth.

Although I had little power, I had power. And with that power, I can change what’s important to me.

I picked myself up.

The heavens raged with storms and turmoil

The earth was starved and in pain

I looked up again.

The wells had foundations of agony and were built with pain

Pain and agony that can shape anyone into a pathetic creature. I chose to shape the pain and agony.

I drove my hands into the writhing and seething pain

I began climbing the wells. I climbed to see the luminous light and the world once again

I saw the world again. It was gray. It saddened me and I hated the world.

The same people carried on with their dull and boring lives

The same daily routines created a deafening wall of white noise

The same world I fell away from was still here

The same

I am powerless to change the world

I am powerless to force these people to do anything different

I am powerless to shape a new vision

I am powerless to stand against the entirety of the Universe

But I wasn’t powerless to change my life or who I was. I chose to change me.

I scratched the perfect buildings and crafts. They were now different

I splashed color across the gray background. A little purple here, a little black there.

I destroyed everything that brought me pain. I created a new path.

The heavens began to clear up. The earth was brimming with potential.

I changed what I needed to change around me in the world

I look up again

Above me piercing the skies were columns unknown to me their names

A new question echoed within my mind:

How does one climb columns?

The columns rose high into the sky

They rose higher than any building

They towered above the mountains

They were beyond the grasp of the stars

And beyond them still was the light

I stood beneath the light; I looked down to see my shadow

I noticed I stood between the two wells and directly above them were two columns

It became clear to me

These were the columns of joy and love.

I triumphed over the wells of sorrow and fury by shaping pain and agony

And if these columns were the opposites of the wells

It could be assumed they can be traversed with pleasure and peace

I sought my own happiness and began climbing the columns

The heavens now blessed me with fortune. The earth bloomed with life.

The trek was far harder and more difficult than that of the wells

The wells sank low into the bowels of darkness but the columns were infinitely longer

The wells were the connection to Hell, but Heaven didn’t appear to be at the top

I chose to make my own.

I’m still climbing today.

I look down from time to time. I see the wells and my patch of color in the gray world

I look up on occasion. The light is vivid and blindingly bright

I continue to climb these columns

The heavens are blue and fair

The earth is green and crisp

But there is still much to accomplish, much to learn, much to climb

With my own strength, I climb higher every day

I am not completely powerless. I choose to live a happy life.